Household needs to find better balance



November 21, 2023 - 3:09 PM

Adapted from an online discussion.

Hi, Carolyn: My hubby and I, both gay men, have been together more than 20 years. He’s diagnosed with ADHD and takes medication for it, which helps. The problems (for me) are that he is always late, he can never get out the door because of his forgetfulness and tendency to get distracted, and he creates a mess everywhere he goes.

I’ve tried to help by creating a “home” for items such as keys, wallets, phones, etc., but I serve as the “finder” of everything he has misplaced. He also takes EVERYTHING out and doesn’t put it back, which I understand because he is easily distracted. But I’m reaching the point where I’m more frustrated than ever and can’t deal with it very well. The constant picking up, cleaning and putting things away are getting to me. I know he can’t change, and he’s a great husband in all other ways. Any strategies for me so I can reduce my stress about this? — Stressed

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