She (still) can’t stand her grandchild

You don’t want to spend time with this grandchild. Period. So own it: Tell your son you realize her high energy is not the child’s fault or his, but you’re just not physically up to it. Take your lumps.



March 11, 2021 - 8:59 AM

Dear Carolyn: I wrote in for advice on how to disengage gently from our granddaughter whose activity level overwhelms us. My husband and I have mulled over your and others’ suggestions. Water parks and the like have too many people, too much noise, too much motion.

We are academics and introverts. Crowd and noise drain all the energy out of us. At a Smithsonian years back, the crowds, colors, random motion and the noise made me shut down. First dizziness, then nausea, then I fainted. Airports and subway systems are also a problem. This started when I was about 12, so it’s lifelong.

We think we did a good job raising our child, gave him an excellent education, etc. But must we turn ourselves inside out, trying to deal with a grandchild whom we find exhausting? Can’t we be happy and content with the occasional photos?

June 7, 2022
February 12, 2021
February 1, 2021
December 11, 2020