Aunt’s ‘hate’ for college student could be grief

Student moved in with grandma after losing parents, and aunt can't stop criticizing everything.

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Lifestyle

March 30, 2020 - 9:30 AM

Carolyn Hax

Dear Carolyn: So I have come to the sad conclusion that my aunt hates me, and there is nothing I can do about it.

I went to live with my grandmother, her mom, after losing my parents. My grandmother is and has always been very good to me. Losing my dad was very hard for my grandmother, but she has been able to rally and be a great parent to me.

Whenever my aunt visits, she continuously criticizes me. My room is not tidy enough; I am just like my dad (lazy, in her opinion); my grandmother does too much for me; and on and on. I know I am not perfect, and I do try to be considerate of my grandma, knowing she is older and needs help, but I don’t think I am slobby or hard to live with. I am away at college most of the time, and yes, I do sometimes sleep in when I come home for holidays, and sometimes grandma does do my laundry, but not because I won’t do it myself. She literally takes it out of my room when I am sleeping even though I have asked her not to do it. She wants to be helpful, and I can’t keep her from doing these things.

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