Dear Carolyn: Several years ago, my husband and I moved into a community that was very social. As time went on, we were not included with other couples for social activities. Not only did we become ostracized, we became pariahs.
I was confused and deeply depressed. I was later told by more than one person that the reason for our situation was my husband. No one liked him. People pulled away from me, too, to avoid any possibility of having to socialize as couples.
I didn’t know what do to and I knew I couldn’t change hardened perceptions. We moved to another community. We are only here a few months and I see it happening again. His comments can be construed as rude, inappropriate, maybe even arrogant. I’ve tried when we’re alone to address the issue. I fear the same outcome, only it will happen sooner because he carries the anger and rejection from before.