Should one share genealogy ripe with drama?

"What indeed is the point of their having this information now, except to diminish their view of their father? And, yes, who are you to decide that for them?"

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July 10, 2020 - 2:48 PM

Dear Carolyn: In doing family research, my brother’s wife came across documents indicating that my dad’s dad was still married to another woman when he married my grandmother in December 1927. The divorce on the first marriage was not finalized until October 1928. My dad, his younger brother and older sister are all still living. The older sister was actually born in September 1928.

Carolyn Hax

There was never talk of a different, first wife prior to my grandfather’s marriage to my grandmother, so this was a surprising discovery.

We are all leaning toward keeping this information to ourselves. What is the point of anyone knowing it at this late date? Why possibly impact how these clear-thinking siblings (all over 85) feel about their dad?

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