Privacy is one thing, but secrecy is unhealthy

"I see privacy as not sharing information with people that isn’t their business."

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June 16, 2020 - 7:53 AM

Dear Carolyn: You once wrote that “secrecy and privacy are not the same thing.” Can you articulate the difference? My husband is a very private person. I think it veers into secrecy but he disagrees. This is mainly an issue of what he tells or doesn’t tell his family, and the subsequent conversational minefields I have to navigate. Having gotten to know his family, I understand why he does it, but on occasion, I’m thunderstruck at the lack of openness with the people he’s supposedly closest to. — Navigator

Carolyn Hax

Navigator: I see privacy as not sharing information with people that isn’t their business.

I see secrecy as not sharing information with people that is their business.

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