Struggles of being rainbow family

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Community

November 27, 2019 - 9:24 AM

Dear Carolyn: I am a white adoptive mother of four beautiful African American children of different skin tones. I also have two white birth children. When we go places, I am inevitably asked if we are a school group, camp, day care or “what organization is this?” I sometimes snap back with, “Yeah, it’s this weird day care where I make the kids call me Mom and take them all grocery shopping.” I also sometimes just ignore the questions. Usually, I just say, “It’s my family.”

Then there are the still-nosier questions: Do they have the same birthparents? What country are they from? Were they born drug-addicted? Are their birthparents in jail?

These strangers are generally well-meaning and curious. But, they need to understand their curiosity doesn’t need to be satisfied. Just because they wonder doesn’t mean they should ask.

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