Certainty about wanting to have kids evolves into fear and doubt

A young couple had been certain for years they've wanted to have kids. However, that certainty has begun to wane.



July 27, 2022 - 2:07 PM

Adapted from an online discussion.

Dear Carolyn: My girlfriend and I have been together for over four years and really love each other. She’s my best friend and the best person I know. But recently I’m questioning having children with her. She very much wants them and I always said and thought I did, too, but now that I’m getting older and working full time with a stressful job (she is too), I’m starting to doubt if I can really handle parenthood.

The idea of working a stressful job, taking care of the kids, and having essentially no time for myself or private time with my girlfriend is so depressing and scares me to death. I love playing video games, watching movies with my girlfriend, taking walks with her, and hopefully again soon, traveling. Kids seem like they would make all of that impossible.

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